Homecoming Game

Dakota Fanning celebrates and cheers.

happy halloween

unknown

have fun + be safe!!

xo

there's that one person...

weheartit

Spirit Week Part Two

Dakota Fanning.

Friday Flowers

Apparently these beautiful peonies, which our florist delivered to the shop this morning, are the first for the season. They look so pretty with our colourful cushions and our new orange ottoman!! Hope you have a great weekend.

xo
Anna

i don't know what I feel.

verabiryukova

I had an online-relationship for one year with a guy across the atlantic. I loved him, he loved me. It sounds stupid(even to me) since this was online, but we were in love. I never believed in internet love before this happened. I was wrong. I remember that (one of the times) we talked all night, I asked him a question: "Do you believe that there is a perfect person out there for everyone?". "Yes. But I don't have to look for that person.... I already found her." He told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I wanted that too.

A week later, things went very wrong. He wouldn't speak to me, told me he needed time to think, and wouldn't tell me why. I shut up for a while, but then he started writing stuff on his screen name. And I didn't know what was going on so I pretty much assumed he'd found someone else. He had stuff like "I love you" in french, romantic song lyrics and so on. And the picture that I once sent him, saying: "Escape with me".

I tried to talk to him. He ignored me. For many days. I sat up whole nights trying to find out what I'd done. Then he said he wouldn't talk to me again. I spent a three weeks crying. I had blocked him so I wouldn't have to stare(I would literally stare) at his suggestive screen names, and keep hoping that he would talk. After those three weeks of crying, I unblocked him, asked him "is this how things are going to be? are we never going to speak again?". His reply were some extremely hurtful and rude messages, one of them saying something like "says the one who deleted me off everything." and I told him why I deleted him, and that "it hurt too much to just see those things, and you wouldn't even explain anything". He once again said some hurtful things. I'd had enough, and told him that he was acting so stupid, and that I hadn't done anything that could give him any possible reason to act that way towards me. And I shut up. And he shut up.

A week later, he talked. "hey.. I just wanted to tell you that I'm so sorry". "for what". "for being a huge asshole the past month... I've wanted to talk to you all week but I didn't have the guts". I told him that he had some explaining to do. He told me he was in a car crash with someone close, who died. He'd started blocking out everyone he really cared for, pushing them away, thinking they'd be better off then. He also said he knew it was no excuse for what he'd done and said to me. Worst part about that, I think I forgave him the second he said "hey" that day. Because I really truly loved that guy. I told him that I wanted to have normal conversations with him. It was great. One thing though - we talked like friends. I got used to the idea of it being that way - that we weren't meant to be.

Then, out of the blue, someone I'd become friends with those past 6 months, confessed to me that he was in love with me and wanted to take me out. Since my "ex" (we were never girlfriend&boyfriend, we were free to do whatever we wanted, althought both chose each other) seemed to have moved on, I thought I'd focus on that too. And I said yes. As of now, I've been with this guy for about 8 months, and he's really amazing and loves me and we have a lot of fun. I haven't been able to say the three words yet, though (and I REALLY want to be able to say them). I am not sure if it's because I still have feelings for my "ex"(don't know if I do! but I can no longer PICTURE my future with him) or if it's because I somehow now don't have enough trust in guys.

About two months ago my "ex" confessed to me that he still loves me, and never stopped loving me. He has accepted me having a boyfriend, and we are now really good friends, but I can tell he's jealous. And when he told me I just instantly started crying. Why? Was it because I wanted him to say that 7 months sooner? Or because I was happy.. I don't know. After I sort of felt like I was "free".

I don't know what I feel. I don't know what to do. I'm so lost. I really wish I knew just what to do, and how to do it. I might love my boyfriend, if so, I haven't realised it. Sometimes I wish love was easier, but I guess it's not supposed to be. I feel like a bad person for even thinking all of these things. But I needed to share it with someone.

-girl.

Spirit Week

For Dakota Fanning

Black & Spiro Today

Our new left side window display was supposed to go in today however, we had a few dramas with it and it won't go in until tomorrow so the girls put this temporary display into the window for today. I had to share it with you as one of my most favourite things in the entire world is blue and white ginger jars filled with fresh flowers...definitely an obsession my mother has passed onto me!!

Liliana has Fun

Liliana Mumy (myspace/lilianamummay)

by the city lights

weheartit

Halloween Costumes: Get Inspiration From Celebrities

Don't know what to be this Halloween? Get some inspiration from these sassy stars dressed to the nines on previous Halloweens ...

See the full slideshow on Glam.com.

Clayfield House

Here are a couple of photos of a job I have been working on over at Clayfield. I thoroughly enjoyed working for this lovely couple and their 2 young children. The floral armchairs we made are my favourite thing in this house and work beautifully with the colourful Chinese drum stool which we placed next to the slip covered sofa.

i confessed to my friends that I loved you

icanread.tumblr.com

You've loved me since the 10th grade, this I know now. But I was to absorbed in myself to see you as more than just a best friend. I broke your heart. You knew we would never be. You were always just the nice guy who was there for me whenever I needed a shoulder to cry on. I did love you, but not in the way you loved me. I took advantage of you, everyone was telling me it was so obvious that you loved me. But I wouldn't let myself see it, I blocked you out. We spent every day together in the summer going into our junior year and it continued into our junior year. We were inseparable. Then I'm not sure what started it but we started separating. Maybe you couldn't stand being just my best friend and only wanted to be my friend who was sometimes there. I'll never know. I got a boyfriend senior year and told you everything, maybe that was wrong of me. He hated when we were alone together because he knew you loved me, but I wouldn't let that separate us for good. Then you got a girlfriend. I hated her, but I told you she was cute and that I liked her. Slowly we started seeing each other less and less. Then I realized why I hated her so much. It was because I was so jealous of her. You started hanging out with only her friends and we never saw each other. Then freshman year came. We were both still in relationships. We would talk when we saw each other out at parties and have really good talks about our relationships. Mine was at the time going down hill and you helped me in a way just through our few talks. The summer going into our sophomore year I ended things with my boyfriend of 2 years, it was hard. But you were there for me. One night when we were drunk at a party I confessed to my friends that I loved you, i unconditionally loved you, more then I ever wanted to love someone. I loved you as a best friend and someone I was interested in. This made it even more dangerous. After this party I blocked out what i had confessed, but my friends will never forget it and never let me forget it. The summer went on and our relationship didn't change. We still never saw each other, you still had a girlfriend. Then 5 days ago I heard from a friend that your girlfriend had broken up with you. I immediately wanted to talk to you. But I couldn't because we are not the way we used to be and may never be that way again. I know she broke your heart and I am so sorry, I want nothing more than to be there for you right now. But I can't be. I can never tell you how I really feel. I cannot bring myself to risk such heartache of being denied. I cannot risk losing you as a friend. I need you in my life even if we aren't talking as much as we used to, we still can talk. And that is something I am not willing to give up. I love you, but I can never be with you. You don't love me the way you used to. And you never will because she broke your heart. Why didn't you tell me how you felt before? Why did you have to be the nice guy who couldn't step up to what he wanted?

-h

h...could you possibly be projecting with those last lines? let's change them around:
"why didn't you tell him how you felt? why did you have to be the girl who couldn't step up to what she wanted?"

i think you need to go for it.

Winning Game

Game Day for Dakota Fanning.

Spence Rocks Out

Spencer Breslin rocks out with his band.

Wallrocks

I have had a long association with Brisbane Antique dealer, Nick Wallrock in that my parents collected most of their Antique pieces from Nick over the years. I was thrilled to recently hear that Nick's daughter Jessica has joined the family business. I think it will be lovely to see some of the pieces selected by Jessica for sale at Wallrocks. I am sure she will add a new perspective to the long running and well regarded Wallrocks.

Not only have Wallrocks had a new addition, they have also moved from their old location over at Woolloongabba to Clayfield. Nick's old store was housed in the lovely old building which Crosstown Eatery now operates in. I remember often going there on a Saturday with my mother to inspect the latest shipment Nick had on offer. He always told the best stories about the pieces he was selling and still does I must admit!! One piece I am admiring in their latest shipment is this beautiful 19th Century Eastern European lidded Antique bench seat with it's original paint which can be viewed on their wonderful new website...certainly one of Jessica's suggestions I am sure!

tall enough

thanks for sending this in amanda!

Black & Spiro Today

Here are a couple of photos of our current window display at Black & Spiro. The poodle lamps are very wild yet so much fun. I adore the fabric drop in the background and our new little woven shell boxes which you can see on the table are a current obsession of mine. They come in 5 different sizes and I was thinking it would be a fun idea to bake some beautiful shortbread stars for Christmas and use these lovely shell boxes to put the shortbread in as gifts for my friends. We have a few in stock if anyone else would like to do the same!! For all enquiries email us info@blackandspiro.com.au

love is a thing...

johanna wallin

thoughts?

he could never love me, just as I could never love him

johanna wallin

I was emailed this very touching story.
I appreciate her willingness to share this with us and appreciate her trust.
I still can't wrap my mind around it:

I thought I wanted to share a story of my own, if nothing, just to get it off my chest. I never told anyone, but maybe I can simply tell everyone.

I have never been the type for love. I’ve never had any serious relationship, which is quite okay I think, I’m 18 by now, so that might be my excuse. I never fell in love, because I could never actually care about somebody that much. Nobody could ever touch me this deeply to evoke feelings even close to love. I would shrug any sympathy displayed for me off and go on in this arrogant and narcissistic way, just like I always do, at all times. I am not this kind of person. I am not as full of myself as I seem to be, but this is the only way I can avoid hurting people’s feelings. I don’t want to hurt anyone really, but the only way to prevent this seems to be hurting them. Hah.

Eventually, shortly after my 17^th birthday, my father would call me to him and tell me a story I just couldn’t believe was true. Even though he only has a very small sense of humour, I thought he was kidding me. I never could have imagined I was supposed to marry somebody my father chooses for me. I had never heard of this family tradition. As I look at it now, it makes sense; I always knew we were a very old and very large family, even a founding family in the city we lived in. I knew my father cared much about the family, but since we are living abroad, I never really experienced his traditional feelings. And, evidently, my grandfather and my grandmother live in different houses, although they are still legally married, because they can’t be with each other. My own parents are separated, but married, and I’ve heard my great-grandparents lived in the same way. It hit me then; those were all arranged marriages. Just, nobody had ever told me.

I don’t want to blame him. I feel my father didn’t want to do this against my will, he asked me if I could imagine doing it. Was it a possible option for me? I couldn’t really answer, I know absolutely nothing of love, not even of family love, I never experienced it in our cold and harsh family relationships, let alone being in love with someone and wanting to marry him. But one thing I knew; I always felt responsible for my father’s misery, for the hard job he had to do to send me to good schools, the difficult time he had with my mother, who can’t stand me, for him getting old far too early, his financial ruin and his emotional troubles. As a child already, I cried in my bed when my dad had to leave for work Sunday at 10pm and only came back Saturday afternoon.

I saw all of this and then I knew I was supposed to agree. I never could have said no. This was the one thing, besides good marks at school or playing the lead violin at grand concerts, I could do for him. I hated all those things, and I also hated the thought of being forced into this and probably ending up like my parents, but what could I do? This is how things were supposed to be. And I agreed.

In December, when we went home, to Russia this is, like we do usually on holidays, I was introduced to my fiancé; a man of 26 years, who finished the University of St. Petersburg with a Summa Cum Laude and as valedictorian, who did his Master in Yale and quite recently his PhD at Oxford University and who now worked as the CEO’s right hand in Russia’s biggest gas company. He was very tall, much taller than I, wore a dark suit and had a very dismissive and apathetic expression on his face. It was a very formal occasion, namely our engagement party, and both families were present, even at a larger scale. I had to wear a satin dress and was told to behave well. Slowly I understood how they had chosen an extremely prestigious and, sadly, I realised, extraordinary wealthy family. It was a horrible farce. As we greeted, my fiancé and I, we shook hands, and his hand was cold. During the whole evening, I didn’t talk to him once. His younger sister Natalia, who is 22, and his brother Gavriel, 23, addressed me immediately and I couldn’t help but wonder on how different a character they were; both his younger siblings were talkative and warm, especially Natalia, who is one of the loveliest and kindest people I ever met. Gavriel entertained me the whole evening and half of the night, making me laugh all the time. Only from the corner of my eyes I dared to cast a glance at my fiancé, who seemed unmoved by all of this, and mostly talked to our fathers and grandfathers at the other end of the table. The next day I officially received an old ring, a family heirloom, which was brought to me by his father.

After this, I didn’t see him for almost a year. We went for a dinner once in April, when I was in Russia for holidays. It was the weirdest thing I ever experienced. It was only us two, and I couldn’t help but feel insanely stupid. From all my friends I am considered the silliest and most childish. I play videogames and watch children’s cartoons and skip lessons at school and get drunk with my friends on weekends. I often get tickets for speeding and I sleep until 2pm in the afternoon. Sitting in front of me was a man, who, at 26 years old, had already lived a whole life. He had spent most of his childhood in boarding schools, lost his mother at the age of four, lived years of his life abroad, completed a superior education, built an immense career on his own, and went to war. He never told me any of this, I learnt most of it in the very recent past from his siblings. He was intimidating. I felt like a child around him. It felt like he was my older brother, especially with our waitress flirting with him the whole evening. I couldn’t help but notice how handsome he was, it was almost too much to take, with his tall and lean figure, the pale skin and lantern jaw, the piercing blue eyes, the jet black hair – it only made it even worse.

Sometimes he called on Sunday afternoons, and we would talk some minutes, about school and work, and then hang up soon enough not to let the awkward silence take over. Sure enough, I developed an aversion to his phone calls, and I knew for sure it was an annoying thing for him he only did because he felt it was his duty. At times, I feel a stitch when my friends talk about boyfriend issues. I imagine them cuddling in bed on a rainy afternoon in November and I know I will never experience this kind of thing. When in summer he asked me if I wanted to go on a short trip with him, for three days or so, I knew our fathers came up with this. I knew he didn’t want to, but we both had to. The mere thought of being in the presence of this cold man made me cringe and I was sure he felt the same way. Also, I was sure this was the time we were supposed to get closer. I thought, we were going to sleep together. I was terrified when I was sitting next to him in his car, noticing I was sweating in my dress and on the beige leather seats although the air conditioning was on. He was a man, and I was nothing but a silly girl, and I was a virgin, too.

It happened I got an upset stomach, I don’t know how it happened, but the same night I found myself sick over the toilet after I had slept for less than an hour alone in the huge marital bed, as he had lain down on the couch. And eventually, as I continued throwing up for minutes, he showed up and held back my hair the whole time I was vomiting. I asked him to leave, I was horribly embarrassed, but he wouldn’t. He’d just kneel beside me and hold back this awfully long dark messy hair of mine, silent. When I was done, he’d helped me up, brought me back to bed and order tea, additional blankets and a hot-water bottle while I was trembling in bed. For the next few days, I was delirious with fever, but the whole time he didn’t leave the suite. Whenever I woke up, he was there. And one thing he said I will never forget is, “I will look after you.”

This is when I thought, we can make this work. Maybe, in the end, we will work it out. Although we have nothing in common, although we don’t know anything about each other, we can manage this. This was, until I found out he had a girlfriend for a year and a half and he broke up with her in order to obey the family traditions and be with me. When I decided I could live like this, the day my father asked me, I only considered myself. I thought I had enough to be fine with this, but I forgot to mind I wouldn’t marry a thing, but a human being. I never thought of his feelings. I have destroyed these people’s lives without even noticing it.

I always knew he could never love me, just as I could never love him, but now I know he hates me.

I have done my A-levels and am about to start University in Vienna in fall. This September I am going to marry Aleksandr.

Still, I have never been in love. My close friends asked me, ‘What if you find someone and fall in love?’ I don’t know the answer. I think I wouldn’t even notice it. I know Aleksandr suppressed his own feelings when it came to it, and so will I, in case it happens. I also don’t know exactly what I want to say with all this ... it took me a while to write this down, and I think, maybe it could help someone on something one day? Maybe people will shake their heads on the absurdity of this? Maybe it lets us see how precious real feelings are. You can’t fake them, even if you want to. There are no lovely photos of us. In fact, I don’t own a single picture of him. There is no happy ending, too.

-lara

thank you!

ohjoy!

i received a lovely email from a reader...
it means so much to me to hear how much the blog has impacted your lives!
i am happy to be a part of something that people can relate to and share together.
thank you for all your support!!
the email:

I´ve been reading ur blog for such a long time and never felt any
relation with the storied showed till the day someone posted this:
"I've been staying up all night.

I have no stories about wonderful meeting, fingers twisting my hair,
hands around hips. I don't know your smell or warmth or what clothes
you're wearing.
I haven't ever met you, but I think I love you...." and so on...

Well i shivered bcoz i had just the same feeling and the story was the
same as mine and I was going to do the same as the person on the text.
Well I did and now I´m going to meet this person next December and I´m
so anxious and nervous about it. Just wanted to share this bcoz i feel
like ur blog is a friend of mine who reads my thoughts and understand
me as well.

thanks for existing

=)

Katy

the POST she's referring to. thank you katy!!

like death without the sleeping part

weheartit

The sound of a heart breaking isn’t poetic. It is hollow. It is tragic. It calls for rituals – the denial, the shock, the anger, the disappointment, culminating in hopelessness. Just like a shrinking white star slowly collapsing inwardly, with memory drawn from every breath a blow. It’s like death without the sleeping part.

-elle

Glee Stars on the Cover of Entertainment Weekly

Check out the new cover of Entertainment Weekly featuring the stars of the hit Fox musical-comedy Glee!

Nice Style

Liliana Mumy. The first Liliana would like me to credit to her Twitter page.

Toga Party Pics

Here are even more pics of Dakota Fanning at a party.

you broke into my heart

soulmatesandwashingmachines

Do you remember what I was when we first met? I'd built walls around my heart, gated them, and thrown away the key. I had been hurt, I told you from the beginning. I'd been used, tricked, played with, but most of all, hurt. I thought it best to never fall in love again. So I locked my heart.

You figured it out quite soon. I said don't fall in love with me. I cannot fall in love with you. I won't. I'm too hurt, too damaged, too afraid to go through all of this once more. I'd decided love was just a scam. So we became friends, and that was okay with me, and with you. And it was all nice and comforting and I let myself trust you.

You would listen to me for hours, as we talked about everything and nothing. You learned why I wasn't willing to let anyone love me, and though you said you would never do that kind of a thing to me, I wasn't ready to trust you to test it out. I kept my walls intact even when I started remembering where I'd thrown the key. It was the only way to keep myself from falling in love.

But then something happened. I woke up three weeks ago and realised that I love you. And you said you love me, and you cannot promise we will be forever but you can promise not to hurt me. I believed you. I still didn't realize how I'd come to love you, how you came to find the key to my heart.

Now I know. You didn't find the key. You broke into my heart, and I let you. Just don't break my heart.

-K