Friday, February 12, 2010

ready


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Sometimes I feel that I have to stop reading this blog. Stop opening up Firefox and making two tabs, one for Facebook, and one for Le Love. I've been faithful to this site for almost a year now, and find myself getting upset if there hasn't been any new posts for awhile. I've been in a relationship for awhile now, and currently, as they always do, we've hit a rough patch. Every relationship has, at the very least, one. It's just something you go through, makes you stronger, makes you realize what you have is worth fighting for. It happens at every age, anytime, anywhere...under any circumstances it can strike. It just so happens that ours came at a time when stress levels are higher. Nonetheless, and out of the events that have already occurred, we come out stronger every single time.

However, you always go through those times where you don't feel it's something that will be easy to pull yourself out of. Sometimes you see yourself just sitting there, watching the person before you unfold. This beautiful person, a person who respects you, a person who's loyal, a person who you can go to with anything, a person who glows, a person who believes in you, a person who thinks your gorgeous, a person worth fighting for...a person you love and who loves you, that's what you realize more than anything in these times.

Right now, though, I feel weak. I get clingy, but it's never hit me this hard before. I forget the beauty of space. I have never felt this way for a person before, and as he's told me, he feels the same way. But sometimes, and just sometimes, i doubt our very existence...how did we get to where we are right now?

I want this to work out, but I need to teach myself the importance of space. The old conflict of Introvert vs. Extrovert.

it's hit me hard once again
but this time I'm ready...
I'm ready.

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